Our "Go with the Flow" Homeschool Day

 Have you ever wondered what a homeschool day in the life looks like for someone who is "structurally-challenged"? If so, you are in for a treat! (I will warn you: if you are the type of person who loves schedules and doing things by the book, this post may not be for you. It will seem terribly chaotic. I won't confidently say that it works for us, and that I'm totally nailing this homeschool thing, because I'm always striving to do better, but this is where we are right now. Or rather a few weeks ago.)

I have always resisted schedules. (It's sort of a trademark of an INFP). But even during those times when I think, "you know what? Maybe those Type A people are onto something..." there's generally some external resistance happening too. I have four children ages 8, 6, 3 and 9 months. Since the beginning of our homeschooling adventure, we've had an infant, and then a toddler, then a pregnancy, and now a new infant, and a very energetic preschooler.

I DO try to maintain some level of routine in our days. We follow one of the schedules from SimplyCharlotte Mason as much as is practical for us. I have found that it makes it easier to sort of be on "auto pilot" for our lessons and readings (the more planning and preparation and DECISIONS required of me, the less likely we are to actually accomplish any formal schooling for the day). Despite resisting schedules, we are rather creatures of habit. Our day just happens to start and end way later than most people's days. I'm working on that!

8:30-10:00 am- I'm up. I've made tea, chatted with my husband, and opened my Bible to read for a bit. I hear the baby cry, so I go in to settle her to buy myself a little more quiet time. My husband is taking the first part of his day off at work to get some errands done, so he is in and out of the house for the first part of our day.

10:30-11:30 am- Everyone else wakes up. First my 8 year old, who mills around for a bit and then asks for toast. The baby wakes up for good, and I feed her while I look at Facebook. The 3 year old wakes up to join the 8 year old who is now in the living room reading picture books. They start to squabble over something. I change the baby's diaper, and then the six year old gets up. I make toast for my 3 year old.

11:30-12:00 pm- Baby plays in the Exersaucer while I wrap up what I'm doing online. My 8 year old asks me to request some Kevin Henkes books from the library (he was on a mouse book kick there for a minute), so I handle that before I get off the computer. He starts his chores, which include sweeping the dining room floor, emptying small waste baskets, and checking the mail. (He is kind of a self-starter. Also, he knows that screen time doesn't happen until his chores are done).

12:30 pm- My husband returns home briefly before heading for work. He brought coffee. We talk in the kitchen until he has to go.

12:30-1:30 pm- The baby gets another diaper change, and I realize I haven't eaten yet! I put the baby in the Ergo and head to the kitchen to make myself something. The older kids are gathered around the tablet watching whatever the 3 year old is watching on YouTube Kids (until I shoo them away). He watches lots of toy videos (ugh), but also a variety of whatever else catches his fancy. In the past couple of weeks, I've seen Peppa Pig, Thomas and Friends, Pink Panther and some others. At some point, the 8 year old begs off of school today in favor of watching Despicable Me again (we rented it from Netflix). Um, NO.

1:30- 2:00 pm- The baby should be ready for a nap soon. I sit down in the living room with her for a feeding, and start to watch a new PBS documentary called No Mas Bebes. I am trying to see if she will get drowsy and fall asleep. The three year old begins quizzing me on how to spell the words, "um", "no", "yes", "Saturday" and "remote." The six year old comes into the room and starts to play with the baby. I fuss at the 6 year old for getting the baby worked up again, and quickly apologize for snapping at her. I send the bigger kids to play in the room while I feed and try to settle the baby. Three year old is playing on the tablet. I abandon the program eight minutes into it. The big kids were fighting. This nap time approach isn't working!

2:00- 3:00 pm- I use the restroom and put the baby back in the Ergo. Baby begins to fall asleep while I start on dishes and laundry and a new podcast episode. By three o'clock, I have put the baby in bed, and get ready for our lessons.

3:00-3:30 pm- Head to the kids' bedroom to start on school lessons. (I have deemed their room to be the most distraction-free location for lessons to take place for the time being. We live in a small apartment, so we don't have a dedicated school space, and the 3 year old is not occupied in the same way from one day to the next usually. We need to be flexible and do what works!) And I always have the three year old occupied with something in another room because being quiet is not one of his strengths! (And being loud is not one of my strengths!) We get started on Scripture memorization and Bible reading, and are interrupted by the three year old who first needs assistance in the restroom, and minutes later, requests a snack.

3:30- 4:00 pm- Attempt to transition from Bible reading to the next portion of our lessons, but end up discussing Esther the Girl Who Became Queen, and how it compares to the real story of Esther (which we haven't actually read yet- we were reading from Matthew today). The children begin flipping through the Bible, reading certain passages briefly (they are remembering many of the verses from VeggieTales). I manage to get us back on track, telling the children that they may explore the Bible more after we do our other lessons (which they ultimately do). There is a potty break, and the 3 year old requires attention again. 

I hear the baby wake up from her nap. I get her out of bed, and finish reading chapter two of The Cricket in Times Square. The 8 year old works on Khan Academy for math. I let him choose the duration, but it must be at least 10 minutes, and no more than 15 minutes. (Charlotte Mason recommends brief lessons to sustain the child's interest. It works for us!) My 6 year old works on a chapter of Life of Fred: Cats. I requested it from the library because she seemed to be having some trouble with some of the Khan Academy content. (We've tried LOF before, and it didn't sustain their interest. I LOVE the concept, but we likely won't get it again any time soon.) We end up skipping our reading from The Boy Who Invented TV (a children's book about Philo Farnsworth) because the baby woke sooner than expected.

4:00- 5:30 pm(ish)- I read Grover's Good Manners to the three year old and the baby, and nurse the baby briefly afterwards. The big kids make sandwiches while I feed the baby some solid food (she is really loving butternut squash right now). I eat something as well. I put a chicken in the slow cooker. (Mine actually runs really hot for some reason. Dinner will be ready in a few hours!) I start another load of laundry.

5:45 pm- I sit down to resume watching No Mas Bebes. (I find the story so heartbreaking. It's about some Hispanic women in 1970's Los Angeles who were sterilized without their informed consent.) This is free time for everyone. The 8 year old is having tablet time. The 6 year old usually looks on with the 8 year old, or she works on drawings, plays with her dolls or another toy. The 3 year old plays on the computer.

6:30 pm (and beyond)- The baby takes another nap later in the evening, and usually I tidy up the kitchen and do other chores with her in the Ergo while I wait for my husband to get off work. He is usually home by 10 pm, so we have a long wait! We eat dinner when he gets home. We would not be able to do this if the kids went to a traditional school, of course. (Now, I will disclose that this is not exactly intentional on my part. I would rather have everyone eat a little earlier, and be about ready for bed when he gets home, but I must admit that I like everyone to eat together too). Sometimes in the "waiting for dad" time, I let the children watch something together on TV.

Overall, our days tend to manifest as a combination of Charlotte Mason style learning and unschooling. We read lots of books, learn about a variety of subjects, but also have plenty of time to find our own rhythm and explore our own interests.

As of this writing (this day was a few weeks ago), our days do not look like this! We are taking a couple weeks off of our usual mom-facilitated learning as the baby works out some developmental stuff. (Nine month sleep regression is a real thing!) Last week, she barely napped longer than 15 minutes, so that made our school time really challenging. I decided this week, we would lean into that and give her the space to work it out. She's still not back to her usual nap routine, and a few of us have been feeling a bit sniffly, so the break is well-timed.

The older two children have been reading a book called Kid Presidents (a book about what the presidents were like as children), as well as other library books. I am working to implement a 30 minute daily individual reading time, so before screen time happens, they need to get their reading in. My 8 year old has been doing his math online this week before screen time as well. Yesterday, the two older children rediscovered their marble run. I happened to go into the room while they were taking a break from their fun, and noticed a stopwatch and paper and pencil on the floor. They had been timing how long it took for the marbles to reach the bottom, and seeing which one was faster. I don't worry much when we take breaks because I know that they are always learning! It may not look like school, but their knowledge is always growing! 

Do you homeschool? What does a day look like in your home? 

Sharing today at Simple Homeschool's Annual Day in the Life Series.

Linking Up with:
Thank Goodness It's Monday
Hip Homeschool Moms
Titus 2sdays 
A Little R&R
Whole Hearted Wednesday 

One Small Habit

I have been through seasons of mothering where I just feel frazzled. The house won't stay tidy(ish), every time I turn around, someone needs something from me, I don't have any "me time" set aside in my day.

What I realized is that a lot of times, my own personal habits were contributing to my feelings of being stressed! At times, I go around putting out all these little fires, when something really simple could have prevented that "fire" altogether.

• If I come across my preschooler's stray shoe in a random room, and take a minute to put it away instead of telling myself that I'll remember where I saw it earlier
• If I wash the dishes in the sink before bed instead of leaving them for later
• If I get my coffee ready to brew the night before instead of trying to measure coffee grounds and water first thing in the morning
• If I renew a book through the library's website right when I remember to instead of putting it off
• If I decide what I want to make for dinner early in the morning, and pull meat from the freezer to thaw right away instead of thinking that I have time to think about it

I'm sensing a theme! If the task is something that only takes a moment, do it NOW, rather than promising yourself that you'll remember to do it later, at a more convenient time. I don't know how many times I've kicked myself for putting something off that could have been done quickly and easily.

What I tell myself in these moments when I'm tempted to ignore a task, is "doing this now will be a blessing to me later!" That may sound like a selfish way of thinking, but it really is a help to everyone in my family. In the instance of putting the shoes away the moment I notice them abandoned on the floor, I won't be scrambling later, or delayed on our way out the door. It really helps everyone! (And mom isn't stressing out, which I've come to realize is hugely important to my husband and children!)

How about you? Are you taking an extra minute to bless your future self? Is there anything you could do right now, that you'll thank yourself for later? 

Linking up:
Hearts for Home Blog Hop
I Choose Joy 
Fellowship Friday

Five Minute Friday: Seasons are About Change

Season. We are well into the Christmas season.

With that comes the lists from my children. My oldest is now eight, and the seasons are changing for him, too. It used to be that he was a bit oblivious of the times and seasons, and now it's a big deal for him. He recently has begun counting down to his birthday, and Christmas, and other occasions when he might get stuff.

It's so important to him. I miss the seasons when it was easier to surprise him. Times were simpler when he was younger.

My six year old is still in that season of simplicity. My three year old is coming into the season where he is aware of different occasions. And the baby? Everything is new for her!

Seasons are about change. For children and for mothers. 

Linking up for Five Minute Friday

Speaking Good Things Over Our Children

One day after my two older children had left on an outing with their grammy, I was home alone with my three year old son and napping three month old daughter.

I received a phone call from my husband who had been at work all day, and I was eager to talk to him. As we were chatting, my three year old ran into the room, and began to play with the baby's swing. He pushed it roughly, and switched on buttons, and music played, while the swing rocked quickly forward and back without the weight of a baby in it.

"Stop messing with the swing!" I snapped, more interested in getting back to my conversation with my husband.

The three year old switched the buttons off, and then on again in a flash, and ran out of the room.

"Little turkey!" I yelled.

"I not a turkey!" he yelled back.

"Did he just say he's not a turkey?" my husband laughed. "You can have what you say, you know."

That phrase. "You can have what you say." I know it to be true. But how often do I observe outward appearances and call it as I see it? Had the stress of motherhood made me forget to speak good things over my children, rather than just labeling them by the looks of their behavior?

Our culture applauds those who "say what's real", and so we value people when they make seemingly accurate observations. As Christians, though, we're called to go beyond that. To see beyond the see-able. To see what God sees.

In Genesis, we see the universe in chaos. Thankfully, God chose to see past that. He said, "let there be light."

My son came back in the room. "You're a blessing," I said to him.

"OH! Thank you, mom!" he beamed.

Our children need us to remind them how God sees them- not just how their behavior causes them to appear- and certainly not how they make us feel in a moment of tension. God's word is a mirror- to us, and to them.
Let's build up our children to be the awesome men and women God has called them to be!

What phrases can you speak over your children to affirm who they are in Christ?

Linking up with:
Mama Moments Mondays
Teaching What is Good 

Inviting Cooperation from Young Children

I just celebrated my youngest guy's second birthday this month! Could it already be? I swear I was just telling you all that I was expecting him!

At any rate, he is quickly gaining independence and communication skills and reaching other important milestones so fast. It can be hard to keep up with all the changes, am I right, moms? I feel like I was just getting the hang of mothering this baby, and now he's already into "young child" territory!

Are you in the same season with your little one(s)? Or maybe you work with toddlers or preschoolers on a regular basis. Whatever the case, we could all stand to take a minute and see things from a young child's perspective for a minute to figure out ways to best communicate with them to make our days run a little more smoothly! Today, I'm revisiting some of the ways that have helped me deal gently, but effectively my little guy (and that I still frequently use with my older children now ages 4 ½ and 7).  I'm honored to share these tips as a guest on my friend Jenni Mullinix's blog! Join me over there today and share any additional ways you know of to invite cooperation from toddlers and preschoolers! (Click the link to continue reading!)








  

 

Tips for Visiting the Library with Little Ones

I've always heard that one should write what they know. Haven't you heard that? Well, this knowing has come by much trial and error, and frazzledness at the end of a trip to the library with my three little ones, ages 7, 4 and (almost) 2. I began to think of ways I could streamline our trips and make it so it didn't turn out to be a stress-filled frenzy where I crazily tried to manage the needs and desires of my three children and myself. I know it probably sounds melodramatic, but it can be that way sometimes! (Being outnumbered in public is no joke, people!)

Being homeschoolers (and avid readers), our regular library trip has been an important part of our week for a long time. We go at least once a week, if not more. We also have library cards at more than one library. (I know, I'm really asking for the crazy-making). ;-)

Whether you're getting ready for the Summer Reading Program, or you simply want to make visiting the library a regular (and stress-free) part of your week,  here are some tricks I've discovered that go a long way in keeping the weekly library trip an enjoyable experience for all of us!

Before you head out:

1. Make a list! Yep, Type-A's rejoice! Do you know what books you are after? Take a few minutes to write them down to keep your time searching focused. (I've learned the difficulty of the having my head tilted sideways and sometimes bending over looking for interesting, good quality books while trying to keep track of three little people, who are sometimes going in three different directions!) Get inspiration from lists like this one, or this one, or this one, if you don't know where to start! Which leads me to my next tip...
2. Utilize your library's website! You can search online to find out if a book or other item is currently available. You can also place a request for the item if you know you need it and can't get there right away, and the library staff or a volunteer will retrieve it and put it aside for you. Some libraries even offer a mobile app. See if your library does! Oh, and two words: interlibrary loan! You probably can't go to ALL the libraries, but they can come to you! Sometimes other libraries in your county will have an important book that you need and your local library can borrow it from them for you. There is usually a wait of a few days, but it's totally worth it to not have to drive across your county (or city, in some cases) to get a certain book.
3. Collect any items that you've borrowed during previous trips. If your child has gotten their own books, they can gather what they checked out and place them in a reusable bag (I don't recommend grocery bags because books have pointy corners that like to poke holes in grocery bags). Everyone can carry their own stuff to the car.

At the library:

1. At the book return, each child can practice putting their own books in the slot (except for maybe the ones who can't reach yet- but at least seeing their older siblings do it will make them want to do it later on, and create that expectation that they will eventually take on this task).
2. Each child that is able can grab a basket to carry their selections around the library. This is one I just recently discovered, and my littles are loving it! Our library has the same little hand baskets that you see in grocery stores. If yours doesn't, maybe they can collect their books in the reusable bag they brought. I like that they use the baskets because they each keep their materials separate, and it also deters them from getting more items than they can carry- which means fewer items to keep track of at home. It's a win-win. Plus I don't have to carry everything! Yay!
3. Get them their own card. The rule of thumb that has worked for us so far, is if the child can read independently, then they can have their own card. Our library has no age limit, so it's up to the parents to make that call. Of course, we are still financially responsible, but we haven't had too many charges on their cards. Once, when my son neglected to take care of a book, he got charged for it. I had him roll coins to pay the fee. I don't know if this really made an impact on him or not, but we haven't really had any issues since.
4. When wrapping up your library adventure, each child can bring the items they wish to borrow to the checkout desk. (We have self-checkout kiosks, and you might like to take advantage of that option, but I really like the opportunity afforded to my little ones to practice their people skills while they check out their materials.) They get their items checked out, put the borrowed things in their bags and carry their own stuff to the car, and back inside the house.

At Home:

1. Find a special location for borrowed library items. We have a rule that library items are not kept in bedrooms. It's way too easy for something to get lost under a bed or in a closet or under a pile of clothes or something. That was a hard-learned lesson after spending 45 minutes looking for a board book. Ain't nobody got time for that! Keep library books on a designated shelf or in a basket in a main living area in your home. Trust me! It's so worth creating this habit. This is a good way to prevent damaged items too!
2. Make a plan to visit the library again very soon! Most libraries allow items to be out for three weeks, but why wait that long? Set a day each week when you will visit. Tuesday has become our day to visit our local library. Sometimes we visit for various events on another day of the week, but we usually don't return or check out books on that day, just to keep things simple. 

Most important: have fun! Children love visiting the library, and it's one of the best places to go when it's too hot to play outside. And it's FREE! You never know what awesome resources you will discover when you visit. Happy reading!

What tips would you add that have helped you have a pleasant library experience? Tell me in a comment!

Linking up at these fine blogs:

Blessings. (But Mostly the Other Stuff that Happened on Sunday Morning...)

The children woke easily to bribes promises of cereal bars on the way to church. The morning would be a little rushed, but we would make it on time to church. My son's clothes were laid out, all he had to do was get dressed, and put on his socks and shoes. My daughter got out of bed, and I started to get her ready. I thought I would get her dressed, and while she was putting on her socks and shoes, I would finish putting on my make up, and we'd be good to go.

"Mom...I can't find my sneakers!" called my almost 5 year old.

This is where it gets interesting. I finished getting my 2 year old dressed and sent her to put her socks and shoes on. The boy had just had his shoes the night before, and he's supposed to put them away on the changing table. Every. Single. Day. I tell him. (Okay, every single day he wears his shoes- the majority of the time we stay home, so it really isn't every day- but still...the 2 year old gets it!)

Mind you, I wasn't finished getting ready yet. I stop what I was doing, thinking they must be under the couch or one of the other usual hiding places for his shoes. He looked in all the places I told him, and...no shoes.

After a few minutes of searching, I realize it's time to go. He's only wearing his shirt, pants and socks. Oh yeah...and it's raining. After a week straight of 83 degree highs and sunshine. Go figure.

I sent out an "SOS" text to the other teacher on the schedule in children's ministry letting her know we were now running late. A few minutes later, she responds letting me know that she had just been awakened by my text message!

Sigh. Okay.

I make a quick call to another "off duty" teacher to see if she can cover for me til I arrive. All I can say is "thank God for people I know I can always count on!" (Even if I'm not one of them!)

Finally, I give up on finding the boy's sneakers. "Get your sandals and put them on over your socks." In his room, I hand him a sandal. "Where is the other one?!" This is the part where I lost it. Just a little. I frantically search for the matching sandal for a few minutes whilst verbally expressing my frustration at his lack of diligence. (Yes, I know he's four). Finally, the other sandal is located, and I send him on his way, and get back in the bathroom to finish getting ready.

I hear him struggling in the other room to put them on his feet. Did I mention these are sandals he has basically outgrown? Yep. So with the too-snug sandals and socks finally on his feet, we make it out the door and on our way.

Miraculously, I was not a basket case by this point. God is so good. Remember the rain? It was still coming down, of course. As I drove along the wet asphalt, I realized how perfect His timing is. Earlier in the week, my husband was able to put four new tires on the van. And just yesterday? We had the majorly cracked windshield replaced. (Both things were LONG overdue by most standards). Amazing. Driving in the rain can be a tad scary in these parts, since it is such a seldom occurrence. Plus we have a lot of "winter visitors" with "questionable" driving skills around this time of year. I'm just so blessed to know that He saw ahead to supply new tires and a new windshield for a time I would definitely need them!

Oh, and the sneakers? We finally found them. After church. In the hamper.

What blessings (or obstacles!) have come your way recently?

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But Why, God?

I'm a mother of a four year old. For the longest time, I would hear of moms going a little crazy when their little one would start asking the question, "why?" These moms had children who were two or three years old. My little guy never really asked that question at that age. I reasoned that he's a bright kid, and if he wanted to know why something happened, he would either try to discover the reason for himself, or eventually, he would ask, and be satisfied with my response.

Fast forward to now: I'm the mama going a little crazy with the incessant questions. "Why?"

"It's time for bed," I'll say.

"But, why?"

"You need to eat your dinner."

"Why?"

I started to hear the dreaded question more and more frequently. I would explain each reason to the best of my ability, trying really hard not to resort to "because I said so". Until one day, when I realized that "why?" doesn't actually mean "why?" As in, my four year old doesn't really care "why". In a lot of cases, I've discovered that it's a form of protest. As in, he doesn't want to go to bed. He doesn't want to eat dinner. He doesn't like the fact that we can't go to the park today. Why doesn't really matter.

Does any of that sound familiar to you? I know I've gone through seasons where the events are just so frustrating, that all I can say is "but why?!" Why do I have to deal with this? Why can't this person just do the right thing and stop bothering me? Why can't I just go out and buy whatever I want or feel like I need? Why does that family get to go on vacation, and we don't? Why, why, WHY?

The answers often elude me. But the fact is, I don't really want to know "why". I just want to escape the situation and get back to a place of comfort. In essence, I'm telling God "it shouldn't be this way. Fix it!"

The answer to the question "why" is usually something that my four-year-old wouldn't be able to truly comprehend or appreciate to the fullest extent- at least not now. In the same way, if God decided to tell me why, I'd probably be overwhelmed by the answer. It wouldn't make sense from where I'm standing right now. Just like we as parents have understanding that exceeds our children's, God's ways are infinitely higher than our ways.

"For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are My ways higher than your ways, and My thoughts than your thoughts." Isaiah 55:9

Have you (like me) ever been through a season where you asked the question every parent (including God) loves to hear?

Linking up at:
I Choose Joy

Birthing Naturally in the Hospital

If you're expecting a little one (or planning on expecting one in the future), no doubt you've thought about how you'd like things to go at your baby's birth. Maybe you long to have a home birth, but for whatever reason, that just isn't possible. You can still have a natural experience if you are giving birth in the hospital. I will share a few tips that will get you closer to your goal.

Create a Birth Plan- I will just say this up front: if your desire is to just let nature take it's course, please, please, please do not show up at the hospital once you're in labor and expect it to just "flow" that way. You must have a plan. (Now, I know in some circumstances, plans can go out the window, so to speak, but if you have a plan, you're way more likely to see things happen the way you envision than if you didn't have one in place at all.) I would guess that the majority of hospitals are used to laboring women receiving the whole nine yards of interventions. In my experience, having done my utmost to deviate from this path, I was met with a ton of resistance- hospital staff members just aren't typically used to the natural birthing process (again, just in my experience).

Find an OB or Midwife you are very comfortable with- Explain to them in the beginning what you would like to see happen at the birth of your child. Make sure you're both on the same page. Expect your practitioner to ask questions like "what do you want to do in this or that situation?" If your doctor seems adamant that any particular situation would require augmentation or any kind of intervention, you may want to consider finding another birth attendant if possible. You want your doctor or midwife to be open to your ideas, and it's also nice to know that they see you as an informed party, and not just a silly pregnant woman with outlandish ideas. I realize that obstetricians probably see hundreds of births per month, and so they're quite used to the birthing process. They are definitely necessary if things go awry, but I think often times, they have a set "routine" or a mindset of how things should go. You want to know that they don't view you as just another patient. You are about to become a mother- and you want them to be a partner with you in helping you make that transition as smoothly as possible.

Research your Hospital- Find out their C-section rate. Find out what kind of policies are in place. Are they natural birth friendly? Do they offer laboring tubs? Will they readily provide non-medical pain relief measures like birthing balls, allow you to labor in the shower, or somewhere other than the bed? Take a tour of the hospital if it's available (usually it's done by one of the nursing staff) and ask any questions you have during or after the tour. If the staff seems familiar with natural pain relief methods, that's a good indication that many other mothers have given birth naturally in their facility, and they're used to it!

Read, Read, and Read Some more! There is so much information out there that you won't get during the five minute face-to-face you get with your doctor during your prenatal visits. Here are some of my favorite books for pregnancy and birth. You must take responsibility for your health and the health of your baby. Become familiar with the routine prenatal tests, as well as hospital procedures and find out which ones you will consent to and which you will decline. (Did you know you could decline certain tests and procedures?) Should you take the glucose screening test? What about ultrasounds? You need to know the benefits and the risks to each one. Is it necessary for the baby to be monitored the entire time you're in labor? Researching ahead of time will help you to make the best decisions.

Stay Home as Long as Possible- The longer you're in the hospital, the more pressure you are likely to get to receive some sort of intervention to speed things along. Often times first labors take a LONG time (there are definitely exceptions to this rule, though!) Many times once an intervention takes place, it starts the "cascade of interventions". (Receiving Pitocin is a biggie- it causes more intense contractions that are very difficult to handle with natural pain relief methods. Many laboring moms opt for an epidural once labor really picks up, and this can lead to even more necessary interventions. Just because something is done routinely, doesn't mean it's necessarily safe or the best option). Staying home while you labor can help you feel more comfortable, and in the event that labor takes a really long time for you, you can likely avoid many unwanted interventions. Another thing you may want to do is preregister for your hospital stay, that way you can quickly get checked in to your room once you arrive at the hospital.

Are these tips helpful? Did you give birth naturally in the hospital? What other ideas would you add for those who desire a natural experience in the hospital?

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Tips for Nursing Toddlers

I was reminded recently that this week is World Breastfeeding Week! Not sure how I could have forgotten, but I share nutrients with another person still, so that may be part of it. Here's a list of helpful tips for your nursing toddler to make their your nursing experience even more enjoyable!

. . .

If you are a toddler, this handy guide will assist you in all your nursing endeavors. These quick and easy tips will make for a mutually rewarding experience between "nurser" (that's you) and "nursee" (your mom).

My inspiration for this post- between nursing sessions. ;-)

• Please refrain from pinching. This includes but is not limited to breasts, belly, arms and face. Repeat this mantra: "Pinching HURTS mommy!"
• Nursing sessions must be a minimum of seven minutes in duration, with no less than 15 minute intervals between sessions.
• Mother's blouse must not be lifted up while she is attempting to nurse discreetly in the presence of your grandmother.
• If a cover is used in public, it is there for a reason. Please do not attempt to remove it at church, in the food court at the mall, the library or any other place where mother may not particularly want to expose her naked flesh. (Yes, it's natural, but your mother may still be the inhibited type).
• Mothers typically do not like to nurse while using the bathroom. Don't ask!
• Further, please don't attempt to nurse while standing upright.
• If your mother gets up to prepare a meal or do housework after sitting for a prolonged period of time, it is not a signal to you to initiate a feeding.
• While engaged in the act of breastfeeding, it is important to stay focused on the task at hand. There will be plenty time later to identify parts of mommy's face, people walking by, or pictures of babies on the computer monitor.
• Your feet do not belong in mommy's face. Even if she does try to bite them when they are there.

As a toddler, nursing can be a great way for you to stay connected to your mother (in more ways than one)! It also still provides plenty of important nutrients- especially on those days when you only want to eat toast. Not to mention all the great benefits for mom! Keep it up, toddler!

Moms: Is there anything you'd like to add?

Amazing Motherhood in Christ Jesus

Are you an amazing mother? Why, yes! Yes, you are!

Whether you are a stay at home mom or a working mom...

Whether you prepare completely nutritious meals from scratch everyday or...not...

Whether you allow hours of television or none at all...

Whether you are peaceful and serene every moment of the day...or you just really wish to be...

I believe most moms are doing the best they can. And if you really don't think you are, you have immediate access to the throne of God to seek His help for every possible "mommy conundrum" that can come your way. (Hebrews 4:16)

Romans 8:1 states "There is therefore now no condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus, who do not walk according to the flesh, but according to the Spirit."

There's no room for "mommy-guilt" in Christ Jesus! Are you there?

"And whatever you do, do it heartily, as to the Lord and not to men..." Colossians 3:23

We all have our vision of what a "perfect" mother is. I have one, you have one. What really matters is not my opinion of what you do (or even yours!), but God!

If you stay connected to the Vine, He will show you what you need to do. He will direct you and cause you to learn what you need to know. He will make situations line up in your favor, and give you creative ways to get it all done (whatever it may be!).

Seek Him. Trust Him. Do what He tells you to do.

The Bible tells us "But a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised." Proverbs 31:30 (b)

Are you secure in your status in Christ Jesus? I'm praying that each one of you remains confident in your calling as a mother!

Servant Motherhood

Are you washing these feet?

Warning: Proceed with caution if you are the squeamish kind, okay? :)

Today I saw probably the fifth pair of poopy underwear in about a week. (You mamas that have been through potty training your little ones will know what I'm talking about).

I seriously had a "pause and think on that moment" during this time, and I believe God dealt with me about my attitude toward cleaning up the boy child's poo...when I know very well that he knows how to put it in the potty.

It was not pretty. (Poop seldom is). Okay, I'm talking about my initial response. It may have involved shouting (certainly not the "hallelujah" kind). It also may have involved me making some kind of ungodly growling sort of sound that hurt my throat. Okay, it did. I'm not proud to admit that I was really angry about this latest "accident".

To make matters worse, after the underwear was removed from the child, he continued to do the "potty dance", and refused to get on the potty to finish what he started.

(More anger).

After reassuring him that it was okay, and I was going to be there with him (I think he's a little bit afraid of going number two in the potty) he finally finished. I cleaned him up and sent him on his way.

As I was angrily cleaning up the mess, and washing the poop stained underwear, I continued complaining and expressing disgust.

It was at this moment that I was reminded of how Jesus washed the feet of His disciples. And if their desert is anything like ours in Arizona, it was nasty dirty man feet. Sweaty, stinky. Filthy. In these parts, it doesn't take much to get dirty feet in the summertime- and we have pavement. I can't imagine what ones feet would look like at the end of a sweaty, stinky day in the hot sun complete with natural desert landscaping.

God showed me a picture of how Jesus didn't complain about this act of servant hood. He didn't let His own natural reaction to this menial task stand in the way of showing humility to His followers. In fact, He practically had to force one of the disciples to let Him wash his feet. He humbled Himself.

Jesus is better than me. And though cleaning poopy underwear could be only slightly more foul than washing man feet after the end of a sweltering day spent in sandals in the desert, His act of quiet, humble service to His disciples shows me how I should be as a mother. For the first time I received God's grace for this task and was able to smile contentedly while doing something I personally find repulsive.

Yesterday, I saw a definition of a servant of the Lord while reading Isaiah 54:17 in the Amplified. "Those in whom the ideal Servant of the Lord is reproduced". Jesus is the Ultimate Servant. Anything I could possibly do pales dramatically in comparison to all that He has done for us. And isn't that reflection of one "in whom the ideal Servant of the Lord is reproduced" what we want to show our children?

A Soft Answer-How My Peaceful Response Matters in My Home

"A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger." Proverbs 15:1

This afternoon I noticed my son had taken his snack from earlier, crushed it up into a bazillion pieces and scattered it all over the living room floor. Admittedly, my first reaction was to launch into the heated lecture. I mean, really...how many times DO I need to tell him not to do that? Well (miraculously), I paused and began to calmly explain why we don't do that; and started to help him pick up the pieces.

That went over much better than all of my yelling ever would have. No hurt feelings, nobody digging his heels in at my insistence to clean up the mess. It's a much easier (and more effective way) to get what I want.

The Word of God is so clear on instructions for dealing with other people (it even applies to little people!) The Strong's Concordance describes "wrath" in the context of this Scripture as "poison". Wrath can poison the atmosphere of our homes. Certainly life with young children can be provoking, but when we answer softly, we are not only fending off the poison that can so easily infiltrate our environment, but also teaching our children a valuable lesson.

What Biblical lessons has motherhood taught you lately?