Saturday, September 11, 2010

Pregnancy Series: Guarding Your Heart During Pregnancy

You may be wondering why I'm doing a series on pregnancy. Well, I'm not pregnant, and I'm not  "trying", but I do have several friends that are expecting, and I have been inspired to put some of my thoughts together regarding pregnancy, and share them with you and anyone else that might happen upon my blog. Becoming pregnant four years ago was such a life-altering thing for me, that I can only imagine that other women have similar experiences. Some people seem to coast through pregnancy with nary a complaint or question, and if you're one of them, I think that's great! But for the others, this series will touch on some things that I found to be helpful, and other things that I discovered along the way during my combined total of a year and a half of being pregnant. (I know, small change for moms with several children...but hopefully my experience can be useful to somebody!)

This is me 8 months pregnant.  Don't laugh! My sister threw a lu'au-themed baby shower for me.  Gotta love the hula skirt. So humiliating! Lol. :)

First of all, whether you are newly pregnant or just weeks (or days!) away from becoming a mommy, congratulations! What a joyous time in your life. A baby is such a blessing, and if you are like me, you will be amazed at how your life will change in a multitude of wonderful ways once you become a mom! But pregnancy can also be a time of uncertainty, a time when perhaps you don't always feel so great. One thing is certain, those nine months or so usually don't happen exactly the way you expect! Rest assured, it's very normal to sometimes feel ambivalent about your "status". That being said, I want to start this series with something that doesn't only have to do with pregnancy: your thought life!

Cast Out Those Fears
It is so important to stay focused on the right things during pregnancy. Pregnancy is an exciting, wonderful time of expectation and hope, but it can also be a time of great fear. A new life is being created in your body (of all places) and you don't have a lot of control over what's happening. The Bible tells us in 1 Timothy 1:7 "For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind." God has indeed given that soundness of mind to us, but we must cultivate it, and embrace those thoughts and feelings that make for positivity in our thought life, as well as in our hearts. Whether you're fearful about the upcoming birth of your child, or preoccupied with "what if's" about your baby's health, or overwhelmed by anxiety caused by those wild and wacky hormones, you have the power to direct your thoughts and have peace.

Guard Your Heart
I would like to point out that in Proverbs 4:23 the Bible says "Guard your heart above all else, for it determines the course of your life." (NLT) Whenever I think of that Scripture, I immediately think about what we might let into our "airspace". What are you watching on TV? What are you reading about? Are you allowing well-meaning friends and family members to tell you all about their horrific pregnancy and childbirth experiences? It does seem like having a bulging belly just invites all kinds of random people to share their experiences with you. I remember getting home after my baby shower for my son...I was just weeks away from my due date, and my mother in law was helping us unload gifts from our vehicle. An older neighbor lady came up to us and (why, oh, why?) started to tell us (within my earshot) in detail how she lost her first baby shortly after birth. My wonderful mother in law immediately stopped her and said something like, "I'm very sorry for your loss, but we only want to share positive experiences right now". I can't tell whether she may have been offended by what my mother in law said, but I am thankful that she was there to intervene. Not everyone is going to be sensitive about your situation, so sometimes you just need to cover your ears and say "la la la la la!" (I know, super mature, right?) or have your husband or someone else step in and redirect the conversation. Of course, you can always politely change the subject yourself if you think it might be headed someplace you'd rather not go.

Think on these Things
What can you do if you are bombarded by negativity during your pregnancy? Philippians 4:8 says "Finally, brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy—meditate on these things. The things which you learned and received and heard and saw in me, these do, and the God of peace will be with you." Martin Luther was credited with the saying "You can't stop a bird from flying over your head, but you can stop it from building a nest in your hair". I love that quote! You have the power to keep things from taking root in your mind and heart. But it's important to replace negative thoughts with faith-filled thoughts. The internet is a great place to read positive and empowering birth stories. Here's one good site I know of. It's also a good idea to say a confession like this one here to keep your mind stayed on God's desire for you and your baby. Meditate on Scriptures that speak to your current situation. God will bring peace to you, and that will do so much for your daily and long term well-being.

A Few More Helpful Scriptures
"All the days of the desponding and afflicted are made evil [by anxious thoughts and forebodings], but he who has a glad heart has a continual feast [regardless of circumstances]." Proverbs 15:15 Amplified

"A calm and undisturbed mind and heart are the life and health of the body, but envy, jealousy, and wrath are like rottenness of the bones." Proverbs 14:30 Amplified

"For I know the thoughts and plans that I have for you, says the Lord, thoughts and plans for welfare and peace and not for evil, to give you hope in your final outcome." Jeremiah 29:11 Amplified


  1. What a great post! It's a great reminder to guard our thoughts all the time - especially during pregnancy. After having a preemie followed by PPD/PPA with my first, I really struggled with trusting in the Lord for my second pregnancy - especially when contractions started at 32 weeks. He is sovereign though! He humbled me and had me accept help (allowing others to use their gifts to bless me) for 5 weeks while on bed rest and this little guy stayed inside until he was full term!

    Definitely - avoid the birth boards on babycenter! There are some amazing forums on there with amazing women, but the birth boards are not those. They are full of arguing, petty fights, horror stories, and struggles. Not a positive environment!

  2. Thank you so much for creating such good place for moms and moms to be! I'm brazilian living in Sao Paulo and God brought me to this place... I was puzzled by Elizabeth's (John The Baptist's) story, and how she hid herself for 5 months, when I found this site!
    God bless you and your family, and please keep on writing sister! ;-)

    1. Thank you so much for your sweet words of encouragement! (Sorry for the delayed response, I just realized I had a comment- I guess I missed the notification!) :-)

      Blessings to you!